2010 - present
Forgive me father for I have sinned/I watched the apple over-ripen/I thought with time it'd only get sweeter/And now it's turned to something rotten. Why - am I/Expecting something better - to chance by? With each and every passing day/I go a little more gray/Now I'm nearly 2 years older/Than my brother was when he passed away/Why - am I/Expecting something better - to chance by? Why - am I/Expecting something better - to chance by? Why - would I/Expect that I could ever - be satisfied?
2010 - present
We've guests in the side yard/Whispering our names/As you've made an exit/God, what a shame/Crossing over old adobe/Near the hallway’s end/Father I hate to wake you/I need a Godsend /Out back, near the wood stack/She made it clear/What I'd known in my heart/Over a year/Oh, it's unnerving/Don't pretend/Tell me I'm deserving/I need a Godsend/Crossing over old adobe/Near the hallway’s end
Father I hate to wake you/I need a Godsend/Oh, it's unnerving/Don't pretend/Tell me I'm deserving/Be my Godsend
Impressing a Ghost
Giving up or giving in/Either way, I'm feeling thin/After all, where's the sin?/In the end, we're carrion/God, I’ve tried/And I’ve tried/Curse my pride/Though it wasn't - ever my goal/I wouldn't say I was opposed/To dedicating - my better years/To impressing a ghost/God, I’ve tried/And I’ve tried/Curse my pride
Why - happiness eludes us/Turns - everything around/The chase - changes and confuses/Even the head - carrying the crown/Maybe - hitting the bottle will show/How bright the gold glows/No - finally I'm over/Letting my body - run the show/Take care - don't let your heart grow cold/Hitting the bottom will show/How bright the gold glows
Your back against the wall/Are the words comforting?/"Dear, I adore you, but I won't sing"/You're shining, you shine too bright/You're the only light/You're shining, you shine too bright/The only light/I'm drowning - I don't know why/It's something overgrown/Togetherness feels alone/I feel away now, when I'm at home/Don't act surprised/I only wanted a love/Now I - I'm all on my own/I'm shining, I shine too bright/I'm the only light/I'm burning, I burn too bright/The only light/I'm drowning - and I don't know that I/I can fight/Don't know that I, wanna fight/Oh, I know/It's all for show/Oh, I know/I'm in tow/Oh, I swear I kno/Your back against the wall/Are the words comforting?/"Dear, I implore you; don't say a thing"
Life of the Shelf
Seems there isn't much that one can gain/From staring into the back of a mirror/Introspection never was your game/And good advice was not what you wanted to hear/But ask yourself: Who have I to blame?/For putting my life on the shelf?/Who have I to blame?/Should I be blaming myself?/So the wool was pulled over my eyes/And I lost my penchant for trusting/God I know how bad it hurts, my love/What I got up front, you're getting all on the ---back end/So ask yourself:/Who have I to blame/For putting my life on the shelf?/Can I give you care/If I don't care for myself?/When I don't care for myself
A Page From Somone Else's Book
I had a dream once of doing something big/I wasn't always a man without ambition/Oh, I was swallowed whole/I was handed a page from someone else's book/and then another, before I could even look/Oh, It was all filled in/When I have a daughter, I should never want/That I had taught her how to be alone/No, she'll have confidence in being her own
The Climb/The Fall
I can honestly say/There didn't pass a day/That I did not try/Though the mountain, oh I swear/Wouldn't have me breathe its air/And the best laid plans go awry/Could I believe? Should I try?/Was relief a lie?/Bury it deep. Push it aside/No reprieve, just climb/As a labyrinth with no walls/Every obstacle: vitriol/The ascent could be the fall/Could I believe? Should I try?/Was relief a lie?/Bury it deep/Push it aside/No reprieve, just climb/Could I believe? Should I try?/Was relief a lie?/Bury it deep/Push it aside/No reprieve, just climb/Every day, every night/Never once in sight/The summit false at any height/Fuck the climb
Bold and brazen lamb/Never lacks confidence/Do take care/Be aware/Don't you, don't you stray/Far away from the flock/Lest you should
Be the prey/Wait ‘til you get him alone/Stay close, my dear/Wait ‘til he's all alone/And you can smell the fear/That's when you'll have him undone/And draw him near/Far off from everyone/Go on/Young and careless child/Lacking all common sense/Do take care/Be aware/Don't judge all the world/By what you know - please go slow /Make it known/Be your own/Wait ‘til you get him alone/Stay close, my dear/Wait ‘til he's all alone/And you can smell the fear/That's when you'll have him undone/And draw him near/Far off from everyone/Go on
She'll Be FIne
She’d asked more - than I had cared/I'd write her a song/But I was a child being told/That I had done something wrong/And though she cried/I never tried/My beauty laid on the floor/Much more than I could ask for/My pillar, my full support/Through tragedy and more/She has her life/I have my fear/And so I wrote her a song/That she'll never hear/She'll be fine
Rivers Out of Streams
In the air and through the trees, I can feel the seasons changing. Underground and overseas, every molecule's rearranging. Oh, rains are making rivers out of streams. Oh, life will come of dreams. Every minute overrun, in the moment it's growing brighter. Orchestrated in the sun, coordination of a fighter. Through the dying light, from the cold of night; On the morning I was born, my father said the skies were grey and it poured. But as the day went, the sun it cut through the clouds. And as they burned off, it spilled a light on the ground that made the whole world feel as though it were new. The flowers sprung up, and by noon they would bloom. But as the night fell, the cold it crept back in. And oh, the earth braced itself for night. Hold on, my son, hold on.
How Can I Keep From Singing?
My life flows on in endless song; above earth's lamentation. I hear the sweet though far off hymn, that hails a new creation. Through all the tumult and the strife, I hear the music ringing. It finds an echo in my soul, how can I keep from singing?
Lay It Out
Darling take my heart and lay it out. Show me where the love enters and where it leaves. Darling I'm bleeding out, so I'll take my leave. For the life of me I just can't figure out how to work the thing. And I thought I knew everything.
The days were long, the nights were longer. And how we spent them was our own, and nobody mattered. We shed our skin with every season. And felt them as they hit the ground, as every layer had its very own sound. To say it's thick and heavier every time. As it was, we were young, and we were, we were strong. Time it is a battalion mobile. Its ranks are formed and never thinned, and everyone marching as a veteran. We tried to fight, but it overtook us. Our youth was left out on the field. So start running triage while age steps in to deal. It cuts our days and nights shorter every time.
How's the weather in the clouds? In your ivory tower leagues above where no one hears us shout? How's the structure that you've built? Is it standing strong while everyone is trying to figure it out? How can anybody win when resolve of all the gifted's paper-thin? Tell me how does one get ahead? Should we prop ourselves on the shoulders of the dead? Should we all bring out our dead? Like a record on the shelf, becoming more obscure, collecting dust in the paper form of wealth. As you wake up everyday, when you look into the mirror do you love or hate yourself?
I know it's hard to picture, but I swear to you it's true. That just up over that mountain, is the ocean deep and blue. And what you've seen in the photos were someone else's sights. And the pictures your mind's constructed, just simply aren't right. Can't wait to see your reaction. Step forward taking care. You're about to fill a void, that you never knew was there. We're packed and heading westward to see what we've never seen. Stay close to me my darling, we'll be safe I guarantee. I'll keep you dry when it's pouring, I'll keep you warm when it's cold. I'll keep you fed when you're hungry, and I'll keep you young when we get old.
I heard that she never can back home. Left you at the table all alone, and in the dark. But her belongings stayed. Not the least of which, her scent, on the bed where you would lay your head, every night, all alone. I wonder; did you ever watch the sun going down on Helen Putnam Park, hand in hand? Just like a spider in its web, you would only let the good things come to you, and never would you go to them. And in the end you're all alone.
Brother went away last fall as expected by us all. Though that didn't full the pain, now we try to carry on. Brother, oh. Mother gave away your things. And now she hardly ever sings. Though she keeps herself composed, every night she cries until it stings. Brother, oh. Come back home. By this time again next year, I hope it to be crystal clear. Though we don't know where you went, we surely know how to get there. Song sayer, my prayer, please come back home.
If I had the money, I would move us to Japan. We'd hang out in arcades, drinking coffee out of cans. Hop onto the Shinkansen and take it out to Tokyo where we would be giants. And if I were successful, I would fly us both to France. We'd sit out on the promenade, watching street performers dance. And when it got cold, I would wrap you in my coat, on our way home. But, please be forgiving love, all I can promise you is a place in my heart.
Don't Give Up On Me
There's a time I recall when I was young and I was free to explore and to roam about the country. Though my youth, it has left and now the whole world can see, how the things that I own, they now own me. I long for the time when my worth was not my wallet, but what I could give for free. So I lay in my bed, recounting memories of the time when I had but not a single penny. And oh for the time when my worth was not my wallet, but what I could give for free. So the man who I had hoped to be was lost in years of greed. Money laid in front of me, at my feet. Like a moth drawn to a candle, I was tempted by its heat. And I'd give it away, but I'm begging you darling please; Don't give up on me.
Carry on, my love, when I am gone. Let my memory live, but darling, carry on. When you hear the wind, I'm in your ears. Let the breeze become my very favorite song. Please, for me. Wrap me up inside a linen throw. Bury me in the earth and let me go. Please don't be selfish with your love. Carry on, my darling, when I've gone. Carry on, love, when my body's gone.
You're fast asleep Your pillow's cold next to me. In the deepest dark, in the shallow light, I'm here, but I can't feel that you are near. Swallow one feeling at a time. Be sure to wash it down with a bottle of cheap wine. ‘til all at once, it spills upon the ground. You've managed quite a mess, now leave what you have found
Close Only Counts
Under his breath; “What a nice change of scenery” he said as she wrapped her arms so tightly ‘round his head and pulled him in close, like a scarf on a winter night. What a nice change, such a nice change. Then the winter turned to spring and the layers started stripping off with the heat and they couldn’t keep the pavement beneath their feet. So they took to the sea, where they learned for her it was far too cold but for him, he knew that he was home. He would be buried along with his name. He knew it all along. She would be married. God, what a shame. So she left him with the night and a feeling so familiar of a loss and an emptiness compounded by the frost. And another love fades, just as the ones before it had through a life of horseshoes and hand grenades. She would be married. God, what a shame. She knew it from the start. He would be buried along with his name. God, what a shame.
Light's down Saturday night. Through the window did come full moon's light. Ear held to the door, silence telling him now was the time. Without a sound and without a plan he ran alone. Wet grass under his feet as the city lies fast asleep. Past blocks blurring to one, claiming stake on the land, his to keep. Without a sound and without a plan he ran through the chill of the night making his body light, so light. And the sting of his sweat getting into his eyes made the world seem so bright. Without an end soon enough he'd lost count of the bends. Without consequence, confidence in his stride, the world ahead distends
I was born on a riverbank. I was raised amongst the green. When I came of age I raised my anchor and I set to sea. I’ve been to the places men could only dream. The things I’ve seen. Many miles above the ocean floor, where the blue extends for years, I would man my post unwavering in my solo chanticleer. All alone without a compass rose, at the luck of gale force winds, I could travel only where I wanted, I didn’t know it then. At the port of a foreign land, where the natives took my hand, where their tongue contained no word that I could liken to “demand”. But I could never drown the ocean’s call, it was riding on the wind. In a few months time I’d be on deck to raise my sails again. And to chance for another shore, or to lead my life so free, as to know that my remaining days would be spent at sea.
The pews had all been filled the night before, but on this day he'd woken early, dressed himself rushed to the chapel door. With keys in hand he took the knob and slowly he began unlatching all the locks he'd turned a thousand times before. But his hands trembled at the thought of what laid just behind the gates that he had tended since his father passed in '39. And so he forced himself inside to get the programs folded thin, straighten up the front room, check the lights, be sure to test the organ. Greeted all the guests as they arrived, helping them to find their seats as good friends read their eulogies. When he picked up a piece of paper, gently slid his finger in its crease, and as it did unfold
revealed a youthful picture of her face, how she adored him and this place. The services were coming to a close and time was passing much too quickly as each pew before him slowly rose. With saddened eyes they’d take his hand, but soon he was alone and then reality just seemed so apropos. He stood beside the casket "I just want to take her home", he said as he looked down upon his loving wife, recalled the vows he'd read; through death they'd parted, as he'd said.
Honesty is the Best Policy
Please be discreet, I've wanted this so long. Between you and me, I've never been too strong. A better man would surely still his hand. A better man would surely draw a line in the sand. I feel your eyes and read your lips, no way. Please don't misread, the nights can be so cold. Though my heart's spoken for, I'm lonely now, truth be told. And I'm stuck with a man to love, whose love for me is all dried up. To leave him now, I couldn't run away no way. I can't believe it's been you and me from the start. What I have done has brought you closer to my heart. After all I really meant to say: please stay